On Advice To Self

Take it from someone who felt depressed and unhappy for a good portion of his life: if you’re not working at this every day, you’re not going to get there, wherever “there” is for you.

You can count on toiling in obscurity for a long time before seeing the payoff. That’s how this shit works work. Nothing for a long time and suddenly, you’re “making it.”

I know a guy who wants to build muscle. Divorced, a kid, convinced no one will love him until he fixes his dad bod. Does he study a book written by someone who’s done it? Track his macros? Learn how to meal prep?

No. Now he eats one Whopper instead of two, because tracking calories is relatively easy, and following the proven path looks hard.

I’ll tell you what’s fucking hard. Hitting your 30’s and wondering if it’s ever going to change. Living another however many years after that, feeling no different. That’s a whole hell of a lot harder than simply doing the work in the first place, and a hell of a lot more painful.

I would assume A lot of people out there are subscribing to that same magic thinking. That what they’re doing is enough.

It’s fucking not.

You have to play to win. And you have to get used to the idea that you don’t know what that takes. Because

If you did, you’d be there. So start by fixing your nutrition. Next, strength train. It’s not about aesthetics, (I mean it is) it’s about confidence. Are you playing to win or are you content with where you are?

This isn’t a 12 week plan or 6 month plan or even 5 year plan. It’s a journey with a start and no end. If you want to be as good as you dream of being, you have to make that journey. You have to be able to face down your demons and your weaknesses and all your other bullshit.

I had a myriad of reasons for feeling like a loser. So l took a reason, picked up a book on it, studied it, tested it. Deliberately practiced it. Until I mastered it. And then I went to the next weakness and did it again. -

Beginners mind. Quite giving yourself so much credit.

Look like a duck, quack like a duck, hang around a bunch of ducks, you’re a duck. You’re the sum of the five people you spend the most time around. Drop your bullshit friends, hit podcasts and surround yourself with voices that will help you further what you want out of life.

Play. To. Fucking. Win.

If you’re in professional sports, the bulk of the work comes before the game. You need to hit all those leading measures if you even hope to see the lagging measure you want.

I guarantee you that if you start putting this into practice, even if it takes you months to get the hang of it, you will be in a much different place a year from now.

I spent years of my life feeling like a loser, years making decisions unbothered or indifferent to the potential fallout because I figured I would just end up killing myself sooner or later anyways. The vast majority of those years spent wishing for a single rub at Aladdin’s lamp.

Get your habits in alignment with what you want, play to win by tracking the completion of those habits daily.

I hope you get that what I’m saying is the EXACT same set of principles that every other “successful” person hawks. That’s because it works. It’s a matter of whether you jump on this journey now, five years from now, or never. I honestly don’t give a shit.

The choice is yours.